Sunday, October 30, 2011

The monster lives

Thank you for the comments and encouraging words on my last post.

We are still in the midst of dealing with the fever monster, my not so affectionate name for these episodes.

The past few months her high fevers have lasted just two days, but apparently the fever monster heard he was getting evicted and decided to trash the place.

We were treated to a lovely 105 fever last night. That's always the number that really starts to freak me out. Thankfully in an hour or so (after cool cloths on her head & neck and slipping an ice pack under her back) it dropped to a measly 104.

(what 105.2 looks like)

Today I took Lily to Urgent Care just to be sure she hadn't developed any secondary infection. She has a nasty cough that seems to hurt. Thankfully she was clear. Although the doctor said her ears looked slightly red and there was a little bit of fluid, but not a full-fledged infection.

I want to avoid antibiotics and lowering her immune system too much if at all possible. I decided to try garlic-infused olive oil, a home remedy for ears. Lily was not a fan of putting the oil soaked cotton balls in her ears. I had to settle for swabbing and squeezing a little in each ear.

Now she smells good enough to dip French bread in.

I put Lily to bed in her own bed. Her fever is around 103 and she just had Motrin. It would be nice to get a few hours of regular sleep tonight. Last night Bean slept in her bed and Gracie talked herself into sleeping with him (in a twin!) and proceeded to pee the bed! Poor guy was up changing sheets and jammies.

Yesterday I took Gracie and Miss Rose to their cousins school Fall Festival. It was 8,000 degrees, as it often is the last days of October.

They had the best and fastest face painter I've ever seen.

Miss Rose won a cake on the cake walk (nothing to do at all with her uncle calling winners) and chose this!

I love this photo. Her chocolate brown eyes. Wearing her dad's hat. Her airbrushed tattoo. She goes against the grain. She's not a typical girl, and she knows it, yet is proud to rock who she is. I'm overwhelmed with the realization sometimes of the responsibility of raising her and teaching her the ways of the Lord.

I know tomorrow will be a fever day. Thank the Lord for grammie's who will hang with a sick toddler for the day.

Fever Monster be warned. Your days are numbered. About 17 to be exact.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Friday, October 28, 2011

last dance

We are on pins and needles, waiting for the shoe to drop.

It starts early in the week, with thicker speech and extra saliva.  Sure signs of a sore throat.  Restless, thirsty nights.

We wait.  We know.  Even though we hope not this time.

These fevers, while they may be benign to her body, are not benign to our life.  To her life.  They've become so predictable.  I once read a book with a story line involving Munchausen by Proxy.  I know this is me, that I'm not doing this.  But I can't help but wonder, if I didn't expect these fevers perhaps they wouldn't come.

All week I was just hoping she'd hold out until Friday.  Gracie has been asking to go to Sea World, and I so desperately wanted to make it happen.  I went to bed early on Wednesday night and forwent exercising Thursday morning to make sure I had the energy.  All for them.

We did it!  We made it to Sea World.  The morning was cool, which the girls felt like was a great opportunity for fall-like clothes.  And sparkle-y glitter shoes.

Yes, this photo is from Sea World.  In a Sea World bathroom.  It was bright outside and they weren't cooperating until this moment on a potty break.

The day warms up, as it usually does during the Fall in San Diego and they are hot and sweaty.  But enjoying the day regardless.

My nephew came along for the fun.  Here they are checking out two polar bears.

We throw caution to the wind and skip naptime, staying until it's time to pick big sister up from school.

Sure enough, I'm right.  It was coming.  She held out just long enough.  By bedtime she's telling me she has a fever, even though I've taken her temperature and it's normal.

It breaks my heart that she knows.  She knows the feeling in her body of a fever building, even though it doesn't yet register.  She chatters and and is cold.  "No mama, I have fever" which sounds more like "hab feber".

A few hours after bedtime and she's fussing.  The fever monster has arrived.

This is a choreographed dance we know well now.  She will be restless all night and it's easiest to have her in bed with me.  Bean doesn't sleep as well with her there (and she always ends up kicking him) so he sleeps in her bed.  Plus he's going to work and I'm off a few more days.

I get up early and run before he has to leave, knowing Lilybug will be on the couch when I get home, unable to sleep any longer.  I need to get the twitches out of my legs and my soul, before heading into a long day of doing what I was made to do, be a mom.  I love it; I love being needed, being able to comfort, but it does take a toll on days like these.  Running provides the energy and the centering that I need.

This time though, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I pray, hope, believe.  This is the LAST FEVER.

Or at least the last fever of this nature.  We had an appointment this week with an Ear, Nose and Throat doctor and even though it isn't a sure fix, they agree that a tonsillectomy is a good option.  Many children with periodic fever syndrome who have their tonsils removed have the fevers completely disappear.  They don't really understand the link between the two, but it's there.

I had no idea what to expect for timing, even if the doctor agreed with us that surgery was a good choice.  The doctor hesitated at first, expressing a desire to consult with the immunologist we've been seeing.  But we continued talking and discussing.  And suddenly, like a light switch was turned she says "let's go ahead and get the process started."

That switch, I fully believe was the result of many prayers being offered up on Lily's behalf--these last months and that day in particular.  The favor of God is a powerful thing.

And just like that I'm sitting at a desk, scheduling a surgery date.  And the first date offered, was just THREE weeks away.  I thought perhaps a few months for a non-emergency, somewhat elective surgery.  Again, I feel the favor of God.

Because she's not yet 3, she will spend one night in the hospital.  But, been there and done that, so we know what to expect.  And I will gladly trade a night in the hospital for three or four less fevers.  I had been warned that they may ask us to wait until she was 3 for this purpose.  Once again, I know-the favor of God.

Our times are in HIS hands.

So here I sit, with my sweet girl, feverish and dozing on the couch.  Embracing this dance we've learned, the music cueing us at the end of each month.  Trusting this is the final dance, that we've heard the music for the last time.

We look to the light.  His light.  Thankful it shines on us.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

pumpkin patch preschool

Recently, the little girls' preschool had a field trip to a small pumpkin patch.  It was open for as many parents to attend as desired, so I decided it was worth taking the morning off of work.  I'm sure they would have been fine without me, but I don't think I was quite ready to send my littles off on such an adventure without me.

It was blazing hot, as it usually is in October in San Diego, not fall-like at all.  Almost all the kids had a mom or grandma in attendance.

Although Lily was glued to me most of the time, it was fun to see her in a setting where she was a big girl and not a baby.  I know she's not really a baby anymore, but I am in denial.  (see her cute ponytail? she's very into ponytails these days--and see how red her cheeks were?  HOT)

Gracie was much more independent and spent most of her time with classmates and she wasn't as concerned about where I was.

After a presentation about pumpkins, it was time for a hayride.  Which in So. Cal. means being pulled by a tractor very slowly on a short path.  What are hayrides like in other parts of the country?

Initially, Lily & I followed Gracie onto the wagon she had climbed into.  I cannot get over how grown up Lily is in all these pictures.

But then Gracie's friends hopped off onto another wagon and she wanted to go with them.  I was a little surprised, but happy that she was confident enough to not need to ride with me.

See the back of her curly head all the way across from me?

Obligatory self portrait.  Not bad if I do say so myself.  Please note, I do not normally wear such bulky sunglasses.  Mine got left at homes, so I wore Bean's.  They look hot on him.  Not on me though.

Then it was on to the corn maze, which was fun for everyone.

Holding her teacher's hand.  She's so big. *tear*

Silly little girls.  Please note Gracie's rainbow striped socks.  My girl loves bright colors and stripes and polka dots.  She has a ton of patterned socks that were hand me downs that she loves!

The ponytail.  I die.

Pick a pumpkin!

The classes each took pictures together before we left.

What a special time with my little girls.

Monday, October 24, 2011

just write {embracing}

For the first time today, I am joining in to JUST WRITE.  I figure since I've been a bit sporadic in blogging, what better week to start than today. 

I named this blog on purpose.  It's my third blog name since I joined the blogging world some 4ish years ago.  I realized, I needed a name that would stick.  A name that had purpose.  A name that went beyond life with three young kids, because soon enough they won't be young anymore.  A name that speaks to me.

Embrace this day.

It's really hard sometimes.  Because I don't always like the days in front of me.  They are difficult.  They are unpredictable.

Like today.  Miss Rose was awake at 5:30am complaining of a stomach ache.  A Tums and back to bed. Up again at 5:45am, when I'm dressing for my early morning run and Bean is getting in the shower.  We tuck her into our bed and he encourages me to still run (on the treadmill, cause I'm a 'fraidy cat in the dark).

I play the morning by ear, hopeful that she'll perk up and maybe I can drop her off at school a little late.  I'm having a great hair day.  A good run and a great hair day are wonderful ways to start off a Monday.

A puking 7 year old is not.  It wasn't massive amounts, and it was mostly liquid.  But it was still puke.  And 7 year olds, even when they are going on 14, can't make themselves puke.  Her strong grip on my legs as I stood over the couch and tried to hold her hair and the bowl broke my heart.

So me and my great hair took the little girls to preschool, changed into yoga pants and settled in for working from home.  Thankfully Miss Rose didn't vomit again and should be going to school tomorrow.

This was not what I had planned for the day.  But what could I do but embrace it?

I caught up with a friend recently, who has a lot on her plate and a lot going on in life.  Life can be so heavy.

And we wonder, why God?  Why us?  Why this?

I'm learning.  He's teaching me.  Through this book especially.  It's all about His glory.  Everything in my life can be an opportunity to extend his glory, to make his name known, to face the difficulties of life with grace in such a way that shows I am His.  I am his disciple.

Even being home with a sick child.  Because isn't extending his glory, showing his love the most important to the child he's blessed me with?

I am still a work in progress.  Embracing isn't second nature.  I don't want to just tolerate the day.  I want to trust God in every single moment and see what he has for me.

Please remind me of this later this week.  Because Lily's fever is due back.  And I already see the signs that it's coming.  Thankfully we have her Ear, Nose and Throat appointment tomorrow and so they should see things in action.

When I called after the referral was approved, I simply took the next available appointment.

I don't believe it's a coincidence that her appointment is the week she's due to get sick.  The Lord knows how desperate I am.  And as much as I want to protect my daughter, sometimes medical and surgical intervention is necessary.  Still, I must leave it in his hands.  And embrace whatever the appointment holds.

Right now, my children's illnesses seem to be ruling my life.  Miss Rose has already missed 5 days of school due to illness.  Gracie's eye continues to plague us, although it's much better than it was--it's still not gone and we are in the process of getting a second opinion (since the ophthalmologist we saw doesn't do surgery anymore) and then there is Lily and her fevers.

Is there anyway we could have a healthy 2012?

Thursday, October 20, 2011

I made dinner from scratch tonight (recipes included)

Of the list of things I feel guilty about as a working mom, the semi-lack of nutritious wholesome food may be at the top of the list.  We try to keep things relatively healthy, but often convenience (frozen pizza, chicken dinos etc) wins out.  Dinner always includes a fruit and/or vegetable and milk, but it's not as balanced and wholesome as I'd like.

I was raised by a stay-at-home mom and money was usually tight, so my mom bought very little prepared or processed food.  Most everything was made at home.  Of course she bought things like cereal and milk, but we didn't eat much candy (lots of homemade cookies) and dinner was always from scratch.

This takes time and preparation.

As a working mom, I don't have much time and the time I do have I usually devote to spending with the kids and I just haven't gotten the whole menu/meal prep thing down.  I've mentioned before, Bean makes a lot of our dinners because the kids usually leave him alone in the kitchen, but they are glued to me.

Yesterday I had to run and do an errand after work and we were on a time crunch to get back to church.  I slipped out without any kids to make the trip quick and when I got home Bean was unusually frazzled because he was dealing with kids as well as making dinner.  Which is why our usual set-up works well.

Normally Gracie has soccer practice on Thursday nights and Bean has class, so I'm solo-parenting and it's a quick dinner after practice before the mad dash for showers and bed.  Tonight's practice was cancelled and Miss Rose thought homemade pizza sounded good.  I had some ingredients, but picked up the rest while out and about today.

I started off about 4:30pm making the pizza dough.  By the time I finished and let it rise a bit then got it rolled out into personal pizzas for everyone and the toppings on, the girls finally ate close to 6pm.  Gracie & Lily were my cooking buddies, fighting over our one stool, wanting to help use the rolling pin and sprinkle the cheese.

Miss Rose had talked me into a chocolate milkshake after dinner.  The little girls preferred just ice cream.  I'd seen a link or blog for easy homemade chocolate sauce recently, so I figured why not.  By the time I ate and then made the chocolate sauce and served the ice cream and made the chocolate shake, it was 7pm.

Maybe I had briefly participated in the #womensrunning twitter party as I was prepping the sauce.  But on solo-parenting nights, a girl's gotta have a little adult interaction! 

And the kitchen looked like this.  A sink and counter full of dishes.

It truly was worth it.  All the time, my aching feet, the managing of children and dinner.  It was worth knowing exactly what I had mixed into the pizza dough.  That the pizza sauce I had bought (not EVERYTHING was from scratch) didn't have any added sugar in it.  That there wasn't any high fructose corn syrup in the chocolate sauce.

Making homemade, wholesome dinners is a lot of work.  But I'm glad I had the reminder tonight that it is worth it.  And the kids ate their pizzas and I even had one (seen below...a little overdone on the top) for Bean when he got home from class (the class in which he ACED his first exam and by aced I mean 100%!)

(Yes, I realize I am no Pioneer Woman with beautiful pictures of perfectly made food.  There can only be one Ree and I'm okay with my not perfectly round, slightly burnt pizza.)

Here's where I channel my friend Heather and share a recipe with you (I ADORE her blogging style and her food projects).

I think I found this recipe in a magazine.  But now I don't remember where or when.  I love it because there is no oil in it, and it's super delicious.  Even Bean, who doesn't always go for my healthier recipes, really likes it.

Honey Whole Wheat Pizza Dough

1 T. Honey
1 package of yeast
1 cup warm water
1 1/2 cups flour, with 1/4 cup set aside
1 cup whole wheat flour
1/2 tsp. salt
1/8 tsp. pepper

Dissolve the honey and yeast into the cup of warm water.
Stir gently to dissolve and allow to stand for 5 minutes.
Add remaining ingredients, mixing until a soft dough forms.
Knead for about 6 minutes, adding the last 1/4 cup flour as needed.

Coat bowl with cooking spray to keep dough from sticking.  Cover bowl with a towel and allow to rise in a warm place (I usually put mine on the stove as I pre-heat the oven) for 20-30 min.  Punch down and then roll out as desired.

Top with desired ingredients, bake at 450 for 10-15 minutes or until crust is golden brown.

Disclaimer: I wrote down the ingredients for this dough without any instructions, so these are just basic dough prep steps that I follow.  Adjust as needed!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

New commenting system

I've installed a new commenting system to make interacting easier and hopefully easier than Disqus!

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

school pictures

I'm not a big fan of school pictures.  I think they are majorly overpriced.  And I usually prefer photos that catch natural looks or expressions, which isn't always the case for school photos.

But there is something about the posterity of a school photo that always captures me.  To have that keepsake of what they looked like, even in the sterile posed setting, at this point in time.

The school pictures for Gracie & Lily's preschool seemed especially expensive.  We usually buy the cheapest package, so that we have at least a few copies.  The most inexpensive package was $18, and that was for a grand total of 5 photos.  Utterly ridiculous.

But do you know what else is utterly ridiculous?

The utter preciousness of this photo of my little preschoolers.  That is also ridiculous.  Even MORE ridiculous than the price of the photos.  Bestillmyheart.

I was excited that they offered "sibling" photos, since I knew it would save me $18!  They looked equally adorable in their individual photos, but this serves its purpose for posterity's sake.

I even think they *kinda* look like sisters in this picture.

Do you buy school photos?

Friday, October 14, 2011

friday family night

It feels like we have been extremely busy these last several weeks.  Every day, something is going on.  Weekends full of various events and commitments.  This weekend, we finally have a bit of a breather.  I'll run tomorrow morning, Gracie has a soccer game at 11am and the rest of the day is appointment free.  I'm sure we'll get stuff done that needs to get done, but we have some margin, and that's good.

Tonight was a fun family night.  The best family nights don't consist of much out of the ordinary.  I think it has a lot to do with Bean & my attitudes.  If we are relaxed and not worried about a to-do list, things just flow and that's a lot of fun.

Bean bbq'd carne asada.  It's funny how much my kids love red meat.  They get excited any time we prepare it.  We splurged bought the good chips and salsa from the local neighborhood grocery too.  At dinner Miss Rose asked if we could go get a treat after dinner.  It's been a while since we did this, so we agreed.

A few blocks from our house is an old hamburger and ice cream joint called Foster's Freeze, kinda like a Dairy Queen.  I'm pretty sure the inside has looked the same for 20-30 years.  In fact, it was there when I was a kid too.  They have delicious dipped cones.  We took a family walk there tonight for our treat.

We had such a pleasant time and no one got in trouble, no meltdowns (parental or child).    Bean didn't want a cone, but the 4 girls did.  So far, Lily hasn't noticed that we don't get her a dipped cone, but I'm sure that day is coming.

The cones are messes instantly.  Even mine.  We go through an average of 5 napkins per person eating a cone.  Tonight the girls got little bowls to catch the pieces of chocolate and drips.  (yes, you can see that Maleah's chalzion is still there, although a lot smaller than it was)

Lily's cone came out last and she was waiting so patiently.  I offered her a bite of mine and she almost took it, but then she said no, daddy was going to bring hers.  She is getting so big and grown up.  We were at the doctor again today for her fevers.  Still not a lot of answers.  She isn't textbook in anything, so the doctor isn't quite sure what to think.   She is part of a research group he is conducting, so that was the main purpose of our visit, although there are MORE follow up tests that they ordered today.

This girl, so sweet, so bright, so stubborn and focused.  Quite a combination.  We had a real rough patch with her a few months ago but recently she's been very responsive to discipline and to our gentle reminders of our expectations.  She is going to be G.I. Joe Snakc Eyes (a ninja) for Halloween.  My little buck the system child!  She even told her grandma the other day that the pink stripe in her shirt was red because she was refusing to admit she was wearing pink!

And yes.  The photos aren't complete without one of the tired mama in mid-bite.  Notice how messy MY cone is on the table in front of me?  No make up, hair pulled back, this is me on Thursdays and Fridays usually.  Especially when I spend 2 hours at a doctor appointment, when I expected to be there less than an hour.  It's not all glamorous, right?

We walked home, got jammies on and found America's Funniest Home Videos on, one of the girls favorite shows.  We cuddled on the couch while laughing together.

I'm so thankful for the margin we have this weekend.  Whether your weekend is packed full, or has some margin like ours, I hope it's a wonderful one.  Make sure and enjoy every moment you can with family.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

calling all interior design junkies

We've been in our house for over 2.5 years now, and I am still in the process of figuring out what furniture is right, what to put on the walls, how to set things up, etc.  This is the smallest space we've lived in, but it's OURS and we will be here for a long time, so I'm okay with it taking a while to get everything just right.

Plus you know, a mere 4 days after we moved in, Lily decided it was time to see what life was like outside of the uterus, we've gone through two major construction projects.

I really do intend to do some posts about our home and the transformations, but that takes time to compose and I just haven't been discipline enough.

BUT.  I need your help with something.

I cannot figure out what to do with this space.

I didn't try to straighten up before I took this photo with my phone, because this is what it looks like all the time.  Sometimes even worse.

It's this space between our stove and the main cabinets which include the sink.  The cupboards are really short, so we'd fill a trashcan that fit in there in about three hours, no joke.  So the trashcan is out.  

I should go put the broom, swiffer, mop in the hall closet, the only closet we have.  But I'm lazy.

There is also some recycling behind the trashcan.  I'm planning on moving the calendar to a different wall because this is the view when you walk into or look into the kitchen.

Originally, there was a side door here, that would have gone to a patio/backyard in the original house layout.  Now my parents granny flat is on the other side of that wall.

I feel like there has to be some way to make this area more attractive (I may put up this wall canvas which I recently won from The Nester ) once I move the calendar.

But what else can I do??  Maybe a black trashcan would help since our appliances are black and the cabinets are a dark mahogany.

Any other bright ideas?  Have at it!!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Wordless Wednesday

I love this picture of Lily.
We were running to the store after work for a few dinner items.
She needed her purse (it's sequined of course) and her baby.
The purse is across her shoulder, which is how I wear my purse.
And the baby?  The first baby doll I bought Miss Rose.  
Miss Rose named the baby "Bob."
Maybe after Bob the Builder, we weren't sure though.
I love this girl!

(and I promise I attempt pictures of my other kids, but they are at ages where they don't cooperate as much, so Lily gets all the photo love lately)

Saturday, October 8, 2011

a little taste of the future

Thank you for the anniversary wishes.  Bean and I had a great day together on Thursday.  We were supposed to go paddle boarding and October is typically a nice, warm month in San Diego.  But wouldn't you know, it rained quite a bit on Wednesday and Thursday was on the cool side.  We just weren't sure if we'd be too cold to really enjoy the activity.

We left the house a little after 9 and headed to a delicious breakfast spot (if you live in Illinois, they have a few there too) we've been to once before.  On the weekends there's always a long wait, but not on a weekday morning!  I tried crepes for the first time and wasn't disappointed at all.

Next we went and walked around Seaport Village, enjoying the sunshine and the bay view.  We went there during our first date over 11 years ago now.  Then I convinced Bean we should go treasure hunting at thrift stores, so we spent a few hours doing that.  Nothing extraordinary, but I picked up a few clothes items for me and the girls.

After all the walking around, sitting for a while sounded good so we went to see a movie and brought in a slice of Cheesecake Factory's Cookie Dough Cheesecake (Bean's favorite, and I enjoy it too).  After that we hit a few more thrift stores before going to Bean's mom's house to change (she was with our kids and we didn't want to disrupt them at the house).

It was on to Vigilucci's in Coronado.  It was our first time there, and it didn't disappoint.  They seated us right next to an outdoor fireplace (which made the always-hot Bean sweat, but it was romantic nonetheless).   We were adventurous and tried an unusual appetizer which was delicious and we both enjoyed our entree's.  They treated us to a creme brulee since it was our anniversary--and creme brulee is always good.  I was SO stuffed by the time we left.

We got home a little after 9pm.  12 hours away from home (big thanks to Memo & Grammie who babysat).  12 hours of not wiping bottoms or boogers, not breaking up fights or listening to little girls clopping around the hardwood floored house in Mama's heels.  It was pretty grand.

This was a very rare day of being together, away from the kids without anywhere we HAD to be, besides our dinner reservation.  It felt like a taste of the future, when our kids are older and we have a little more freedom.  It was nice to reminded how much fun we have together, even when doing nothing.

The next morning the kids were excited to see us.  Lily asked why I didn't kiss her the night before and Gracie was very cuddly.  I will continue to embrace these moments we have while our children are young, but I'm going to enjoy more days like this with Bean in the years to come.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

10 for 10

10.6.01 was a special day.

Bean and I celebrate 10 years of marriage today!  A month ago or so I put this list together for a class I was teaching.  Here are some principles from our marriage that I think have helped us along the way.  We are both pretty easy-going people, but the stresses and tensions of life are usually what create the most challenge in our marriage.

But these things have helped keep us connected along the way.

Always sleep in the same bed.  Even when we are mad, we are selfish and want good sleep.  Neither one of us wants to be the one to sleep on the couch.  Sometimes we still wake up frustrated, but I believe this has been important for us.

Validate each other’s feelings.  I’m always cold.  He’s never cold.  Early in marriage Bean used to try to convince me that it wasn't cold.  But if I FELT cold, how could he tell me how I felt.  He may not feel the same way, but he has to at least validate that I feel cold.  We've extended this principle into more serious matters in our marriage.  If I say something that offends or upsets Bean, I have to own that my remark caused those feelings, even if I didn't intend it.

Tag team: go with your strengths.  He is good at paying bills.  I manage all the doctor and dentist appointments (although Bean does take the kid too).  He cooks & often washes the kids clothes.  I fold and put away (usually).  While Bean cleans up from dinner and does dishes, I bathe the kids.  I'm the one who organizes, goes through toys and clothes.  Bean keeps up the yard.  We embrace each other's strengths and try to not feel like the other isn't pulling weight in a particular area, because they are probably weight in another area.  

Just be together.  He likes to watch TV.  I like to be on the computer or read.  The laptop was a great invention in our family.  We sit on the couch at night and both do our thing.  Which is exactly what we're dong right now.  He goes to bed early with me, I’ll stay up later with him.  We just like to be together.

Alone time can be almost as important as together time.  I run or have the occasional girls night.  Bean enjoys doing the yard or running errands alone.  I try to get him to take time to exercise or be social, but he'd rather keep busy.  When I can, I will take the kids out of the house for an hour or two so that he's at least home alone. 

Remember WHO you married THEN.  Sometimes when I’m frustrated, I have to remind myself—he was this way when we got married, because it's usually true.  And I was this way when we got married.  We made it work then, we looked past it, it didn’t matter so much—and we can still get through it today.  When I’m frustrated with who I AM, I remind myself that he married me this way, for better or for worse. 

You will not always be IN love, you will not always be in like.  But choose to LOVE.  Marriage is hard work.  Being in love is hard work.  We all go through seasons of marriage---summer, fall, winter, spring.  In the darkest winters of our marriage relationships, we have to remember that spring will come again.

Marry me, marry my family.  Bean and I have taken on each other's family as our own.  He treats my two sisters like they are his own daughters, or little sisters.  We have seen Bean's mom through breast cancer.  
Sometimes it’s just going to stink.  Usually, it’s outside circumstances that have the most influence on your marriage.  And sometimes, life itself just sucks…which makes your marriage difficult.  It’s going to happen.  It’s at these moments we say “there’s no other person I’d rather do this with.”

When all else fails, pray.  Yes, prayer should always come first.  But when it comes to everyday life and the little things about your spouse that drive you crazy, prayer isn’t always the place we turn to first.  There is so much about life and our spouses we can’t change.  God is the only one who can.  His change often comes slower.  And sometimes, it’s US he changes first.  So don’t forget about prayer.  Prayer helps us communicate more clearly and can increase patience.

The last 10 years have held quite a bit for us.  I finished my graduate degree, we've lived in 5 different homes, we had 3 children in 5 years, we've each changed jobs once or twice, life has handed us a lot of challenges.

But we've done it together.

I have no doubt the next 10 years will be just as full of life, just different.  Our children are growing and  in 10 years, Miss Rose will be nearing the end of high school!  We own a home and may still live here 10 years from now.

I can't wait to do the next 10 years together, and 10 after that and 10 after get the picture.

I am grateful this man loves me, cares for me, protects me and always sacrifices his best for me.  I love you Bean!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

wordless wednesday: fresh

After holding this fresh baby on Saturday, I have major newborn envy.

I always knew my name was cool

When I was in 9th grade, I wanted a nickname. I'm not sure why, but I tried to figure out a nickname I could use, but nothing really really seemed to fit or stick.

For the most part, I've always liked my name.  My siblings always enjoyed the fact that my dad had a dog with the same name before he met my mom--just because he liked the name.  They used to tell people I was named after a dog. Which is kinda true I guess.

Well actually, he liked Bob Dylan's song, which is where my name comes from!  It's an old song that Bob Dylan did a popular version of in the 70's.

In fact, growing up my dad would sing this song to me all the time, while playing his guitar.  His version of the lyrics were slightly different from what I see online.  This is a special memory, since my dad had a stroke 11 years ago and can no longer play the guitar, something he did since the age of 7.

My middle name came from my Grammy Rose, my dad's mom.  I always loved having her name.  So much so that I passed it on to Miss Rose.

I loved having a unique name that wasn't weird.  No one can ever spell my name though because there a gazillion ways it could be spelled with different consonants and vowels.  I think there is a piece of paper in my baby book where my parents tried a variety of spellings for my name, which is the same thing I did with Miss Rose's first name.

In the 90's Whoopi Goldberg took on my name and it's spelling for a movie, which I have a VHS copy of and the soundtrack is fun because there are a few versions of the song on it.

Today, I was doing a random search on google and this article popped up.

I guess Boston Rob and Amber like my name too.

Although, I'm a little partial to my spelling.

I am, Corrina Rose.  I hope little Carina Rose likes her name too.